To all the women who are just beginning to enter the dating scene, or those who have had their experiences when it comes to dating and relationships, you must be aware that this phase in your lives is not easy to navigate. While it can be fun and wonderful, it can also be difficult to strike a balance to maintain a happy and healthy relationship, especially if you are not ready for a commitment. If you are just out there to have fun and not take things seriously, you might be losing control and set yourself up for misery and disappointment.
If you are currently single and you want to find your knight in shining armor, here are some advice that will help you maintain a steady course as you try to find a happy and fulfilling relationship.
1. Love yourself completely before you love anyone else
You know it is wrong when your only reason for looking for someone to be with is because you want to feel complete. Expecting someone else to make you feel whole might just disappoint you. Maybe it could work like that if you know in yourself that you are already complete; that you have that sense of self assurance that makes you feel secured, whether you are in a relationship or not. Before you even love and accept others, you need to accept and love yourself first. Otherwise, if you keep looking for your missing pieces in others and if they fail you, you might just end up being miserable.
So now that you are still single, make sure that you do all the things that make you feel happy and complete. There is no one else whom you should be drawing your self-esteem from but yourself.
2. Do not overthink
When you are single, it is easy to get caught up with so many perplexing thoughts on why you have not found your Mr. Right yet, why you don’t get to have a lot of suitors, and so on. Don’t let these things overwhelm you and get the better of you. Instead, work on improving yourself and each time you do that and each time you see progress, you will notice that you actually feel better and more confident. You will begin to see your worth and realize that indeed, you are not just supposed to settle for just anyone. You are supposed to wait for someone who really deserves you.
3. Avoid comparing
If you are already dating someone, it won’t be fair if you compare him with the other guys or your past lover. If you want him to have the same qualities like your ex, you might just end up being unhappy in your relationship. He will never be enough for you and resentment will start creeping in. He will feel insecure and you will never be satisfied with him no matter what he does. If you can’t accept him for who he is, then you better stop dating him.
4. Don’t try to change a man
Do not expect anyone to change for you. The way that a person is the moment you meet them is most likely going to be the same person they will be in the years to come. Even if you are honest and clear about the things you like and dislike about each other, you can’t really expect them to adjust, unless they are willing and they have decided to do it for you. You need to accept them completely if you choose to commit to them, whether they change or not.
5. Enjoy your time being single
Instead of worrying when you will finally meet your prince charming, why don’t you make the most of being single and enjoy it? Chances are, you are not really going to be single forever, so why waste time stressing yourself out? You will only add wrinkles to your face. Don’t you know that the more you enjoy yourself, the higher the chances of meeting more potential partners? If you are happy with your life, you are happy as a person and have a positive outlook, you become more attractive. So this time, just focus on yourself, your happiness, your career, your relationship with friends and family. Your sense of fulfilment now while you are still single will help you get prepared for a healthy relationship in the future.
6. Remember that good things take time
If you are still waiting for Mr. Right, don’t be in a rush. If you think about it, if all that you want is being in a relationship, you can just probably find any man out there who are not really a boyfriend material. But you are waiting for someone deserving, right? And this type of person is worth the wait. The same is true for relationships. When you are already in a serious relationship, you don’t just expect your partner to ask your hand for marriage and show you a ring. You need to enjoy every phase you are going through because you won’t be in the same place twice. So enjoy it while it lasts.
7. If you don’t see your future in it, don’t push it
If you enter a relationship just for the sake of being in a relationship, might as well just leave it. You would know when it is the one that you are looking for, it is the one that is worth fighting for, and if this person is the one that you see in your future. However, if you think this does not make you happy now, what are the odds that it will make you happy in the future? Don’t push it just because you are in a hurry and you are jealous of your friends who are getting married one by one. Love comes when the time is right and it does not happen all at the same time for everyone. Know your worth and don’t settle for less.