Budgeting for a variable income and an international relationship

“I have the pressure to go out for dates and meet business prospects now because I’m a single guy in my early 30s. I’m an artist, so my monthly income isn’t predictable,” says George, “I don’t know how much I will bring in each month. Should I have a spending plan or a budget?”

How to do things that you feel are important to you:

George isn’t alone. Nowadays many men are in that situation. If you are also an artist with a variable income, perhaps you are looking to prioritize your career, find a relationship and build a social network. All of these might involve some sort of expense.

It’s time to be a bit more intentional about your specific plan for going out each week. You should determine how many times per week you will go out and how much money you will spend each time. For example, George has decided to go out three times a week and each time he will spend about $100. This fits into his overall spending plan reasonably well. Because George lives in a big city with lots of opportunities, it’s wise to start out a little more conservatively when it comes to spending while building his networks. When his new network helps him to generate more and more income, he may increase the amount that he is ready to spend while going out. In other words, spending money on going out with people is actually an investment, i.e., because he goes out with others (which inevitably involves spending money), he builds his network that brings new opportunities to him. These opportunities include new business, new dates, etc. If you were George, the next time you close a deal, what would you do with that money? Are you going to save that money? Or are you going to invest it correctly? That is to say, you would be well-advised to create a plan before you need the plan. This is what wealthy people do: they make plans before they need something. Hence, building specific plans is paramount!

If you have debt, can you bring it up in an international relationship?

Actually, George is keen to date a foreign woman because he likes Eastern European culture. Thus, Geroge will start an international relationship someday. Because George isn’t from an affluent family, he still has student debt from his university days. Currently, Geroge is working on paying it off, and he would like to know how to present this situation to his partner in a positive way which wouldn’t lead his partner to assume responsibility or freak out. Gary Vaynerchuk says student debt is the No. 1 issue in the American economy right now.

Although it’s true that some individuals would be scared by debt, what they truly need to understand is you fully know how much debt you have and what you are doing about your debt. Remember that everyone comes to relationships with some sort of baggage which might scare somebody away. If you meet the challenge head-on while taking accountability as well as responsibility, your partner should be able to breathe and calm down. Your baggage becomes a part of your journey, so when you present it this way, you become a leader instead of a guy that needs saving. In this way, your partner will respect you more as a result.

“Every couple need to have uncomfortable conversations at some stage in their relationship, including couples in international relationships. Do you have the tact to do that well?”